One Strike And You're Out

Staying out of trouble in school is a hard thing to do if you already have a mark on your record. School Administrators just look at which child has a "record" for bad behavior and punish that child instead of taking each incident on an individual basis and punishing accordingly. Once you have a blemish on your record, you can almost guarantee that you will get suspended whether you started a fight, were attacked by a group of kids, or merely touch another student.
Let me be more specific. As you know from my previous blog, I have a child in middle school in the Warren Consolidated School District. He started out in sixth grade just fine, maybe one detention for something minor that I can no longer remember. Then the great incident occurred. My son was wearing cargo shorts that had many zippered pocket and went into one of the pockets when he felt something banging against his leg. What he pulled out is a pocketknife that he had earned when he was in cub scouts. He had been using the pocketknife on a different day and put it in his pocket and forgot about it. It even went through the washer and dryer undetected (I am usually pretty good about checking pocket before I put something in the wash). When he pulled the knife out, several students saw it and reported it to the principal.
The appropriate thing to do in this situation is to turn the weapon in and explain the situation to the principal. My son did not do this, instead he decided to put it back in his pocket and try to get through the rest of the school day, but he had already been caught. The result was a five day school suspension. This was a break from the usual ten day punishment for being caught with a weapon. The principal took into consideration that he did not have a record for bad behavior and that he did not actually threaten anyone, he just had the knife on his person.
I understand why the students reported him (I would have done the same thing, I was an insufferable goody-goody in school).
I understand zero tolerance (I was grateful that his punishment was five days instead of ten and it was a lesson he needed to learn).
What I can not understand is why my son is branded a "bad kid" because he made one mistake.
Now, whenever anything happens at school and my son is around, he gets a suspension. When a boy in his class would not keep his hands to himself, my son was suspended for pushing a notebook at the student to try to get him to stop. When a group of four kids ganged up on my son in gym class and pushed his head into a locker, my son was suspended even though he did not fight back. My son was suspended a few weeks ago when he was pushed down in the middle of the hallway, even though there were numerous witnesses that saw that he did not start the fight. He was even suspended for missing a detention that was scheduled for a night that I had to be at school.
My point is that once a child has done something that deserves a suspension, that is the go to punishment for that child no matter what he or she has done. I have gone to the administrators on a few occasions when I felt the punishment did not fit the crime. So far, my pleas have fallen on deaf ears. "It doesn't set a good precedence to backtrack on our final decision." Funny how I have never been addressed before a punishment has been doled out, I have only been left to deal with the aftermath of whatever decision they deem fit. I sometimes blame myself for what happened, if I had been more careful with the laundry, my son would not have so many blemishes on his record. Then I realize that it is not my fault, the administration needs to find another solution besides suspension, suspension, and more suspension. What does giving a child a day home from school really teaching him anyway? My son only has four more months left of middle school. Hopefully he can keep his nose clean between now and then and start high school with a clean slate.